Don't want to be a monk:
- telecaster
- Topic Author
16 years 4 months ago #52398
by telecaster
Don't want to be a monk: was created by telecaster
Kenneth asked me to post a comment he made to me in a message and then my answer. Here goes:
Kenneth:
I'm glad you have time for a retreat day today. One thing we probably don't say enough, because we don't want to discourage people who have lives and jobs, is that results are commensurate with efforts. In other words no matter who you are, what your level of understanding is, and what your potential is, the more you commit to practice and the more time you actually spend practicing, the more of your potential you realize. Common sense, of course, but we often soft-pedal it because we aren't monks and we don't want people to abandon their families in their zeal.
Mike:
Yes, I sure don't want to be a monk. First because that would require I think a more religious bent than I have at least now, and, mostly, because my goal is to be just an average person doing average things whose life is illuminated by awareness, truth, joy, etc. I want to be the guy at the gas station who is doing the same thing everyone else is doing except maybe when I am clutching the nozzle I know exactly what that feels like, smells like, how my feet feel planted on the earth and how each sensation that makes up the world around me is arising as they each arise. You know, I want to be completely ALIVE and know it.
I want to be the father at the high school graduation who sees his child out there and really knows that child because he has been able to be fully alive for her for every moment she has been on earth and who thus really sees and understands all the significance of that moment. I want to look out and see that child and know that I always did my best to experience her as she really was and not as I hoped for her to be.
continued:
Kenneth:
I'm glad you have time for a retreat day today. One thing we probably don't say enough, because we don't want to discourage people who have lives and jobs, is that results are commensurate with efforts. In other words no matter who you are, what your level of understanding is, and what your potential is, the more you commit to practice and the more time you actually spend practicing, the more of your potential you realize. Common sense, of course, but we often soft-pedal it because we aren't monks and we don't want people to abandon their families in their zeal.
Mike:
Yes, I sure don't want to be a monk. First because that would require I think a more religious bent than I have at least now, and, mostly, because my goal is to be just an average person doing average things whose life is illuminated by awareness, truth, joy, etc. I want to be the guy at the gas station who is doing the same thing everyone else is doing except maybe when I am clutching the nozzle I know exactly what that feels like, smells like, how my feet feel planted on the earth and how each sensation that makes up the world around me is arising as they each arise. You know, I want to be completely ALIVE and know it.
I want to be the father at the high school graduation who sees his child out there and really knows that child because he has been able to be fully alive for her for every moment she has been on earth and who thus really sees and understands all the significance of that moment. I want to look out and see that child and know that I always did my best to experience her as she really was and not as I hoped for her to be.
continued:
- telecaster
- Topic Author
16 years 4 months ago #52399
by telecaster
Replied by telecaster on topic RE: Don't want to be a monk:
more:
I want to be the guy who get frustrated with something and starts to get into an argument with someone (at work, at home, on the phone with the credit card company) and then stops, breathes, and begins to see the moment with brand new eyes and then begin dealing with the situation with some originality based upon that moment. And, I want to fully accept myself when I behave "badly" and be able to move on with love.
I also want something that I am now starting to wonder is possible. I want to see life EXACTLY as it is. All of it. Everything. I don't know if that can happen or even what that means. My belief today is that if it is possible, it is something that can't be forced by my mind, that it may come by a sort of grace if I do certain things.
And, I think that a regular person like me can practice a LOT if they set their mind to it and are committed.
Mike
I want to be the guy who get frustrated with something and starts to get into an argument with someone (at work, at home, on the phone with the credit card company) and then stops, breathes, and begins to see the moment with brand new eyes and then begin dealing with the situation with some originality based upon that moment. And, I want to fully accept myself when I behave "badly" and be able to move on with love.
I also want something that I am now starting to wonder is possible. I want to see life EXACTLY as it is. All of it. Everything. I don't know if that can happen or even what that means. My belief today is that if it is possible, it is something that can't be forced by my mind, that it may come by a sort of grace if I do certain things.
And, I think that a regular person like me can practice a LOT if they set their mind to it and are committed.
Mike
- cmarti
- Topic Author
16 years 4 months ago #52400
by cmarti
Excellent conversation!
This is my thing, too, Mike, the not being a monk part. Unlike you I think I'd like to try it for a few years.... but I can't. About being fully there with kids and family - absolutely! Whatever I'm working on for my job, for me, even my practice, they still come first. Always. What's great about the practice is that it really helps with excatly what you want, which is to actually be there when you're with your family. I spent years not being there for various reasons related to me and my career and I will regret that for the rest of my life. What you want is very possible as far as I can tell. And if it's not you will still be far netter off for trying it your way.
I have four children and a job that requires a lot of attention and travel. I've never even been on a retreat, ever, which really sucks. So when I started practicing I made a pact with myself: work at it regularly. I dedicate two periods a day, once in the early morning and once in the evening, to sitting. I use a timer and I sit as long as that timer hasn't gone off. I can't always manage to pull this off, but I always try. I've meditated in the oddest places, one of those being the secure file server room in the office where I work, which I manage and thus have access to. Hotel rooms! I'm a hotel room meditation machine. Empty offices early in the morning or very late in the evening. And let me say right now that a long plane ride is a tremendous place to sit.
That said, I would really, really like to go on a retreat. Congrats!
- Chris
Replied by cmarti on topic RE: Don't want to be a monk:
Excellent conversation!
This is my thing, too, Mike, the not being a monk part. Unlike you I think I'd like to try it for a few years.... but I can't. About being fully there with kids and family - absolutely! Whatever I'm working on for my job, for me, even my practice, they still come first. Always. What's great about the practice is that it really helps with excatly what you want, which is to actually be there when you're with your family. I spent years not being there for various reasons related to me and my career and I will regret that for the rest of my life. What you want is very possible as far as I can tell. And if it's not you will still be far netter off for trying it your way.
I have four children and a job that requires a lot of attention and travel. I've never even been on a retreat, ever, which really sucks. So when I started practicing I made a pact with myself: work at it regularly. I dedicate two periods a day, once in the early morning and once in the evening, to sitting. I use a timer and I sit as long as that timer hasn't gone off. I can't always manage to pull this off, but I always try. I've meditated in the oddest places, one of those being the secure file server room in the office where I work, which I manage and thus have access to. Hotel rooms! I'm a hotel room meditation machine. Empty offices early in the morning or very late in the evening. And let me say right now that a long plane ride is a tremendous place to sit.
That said, I would really, really like to go on a retreat. Congrats!
- Chris