Retreating at home

I just finished up a six day retreat at home and Kenneth suggested that my experience might be worth posting so here goes. For years, my husband and I have retreated for a week or so at the end of December. This year because of time and money constraints we were unable to go on our usual retreat, so we decided to take what time we did have and retreat at home. We divided up the house so that we each had personal sleeping and practice spaces, designated some common spaces for walking practice and set separate times for preparing and eating our meals so that we would each have the kitchen and dining area to ourselves during meal times. We prepared most of our food in advance so that meal preparation was very simple, unplugged the phones and computers, stopped the mail and told friends a family that we were on retreat. We also chose simple "yogi jobs" for ourselves and made a committment not to do any other work around the house during the retreat. We had a final dinner together on the first night, made an agreement as to when we would come out of silence and set the parameters for note writing (none, unless absolutely necessary) and then went into our private spaces and silence. From there it was a very disciplined schedule of sitting and walking practice and tending to basic human needs. My husband chose to also listen to some recorded dharma talks.

I was actually surprised by how disciplined I could be in a setting that provided ample possiblities for distraction. My resolve was very strong, something like "I'm not going to have an opportunity for a long retreat for the foreseeable future. If I am going to get enlightened, I am going to have to do it as a householder. I have six days. Let's do it." So I did. I completed a Path during the retreat, much to my own surprise.

That is very cool and very impressive. Congratulations on path and on figuring out how to retreat at home!

Just a few more things to add. I was grateful that I had knowledge of the Progess of insight, especially since I did not have access to a teacher during the retreat. It was very helpful to recognize my various pleasant and unpleasant experiences as stages and not medical emergencies or an imminent descent into insanity. I found it interesting that at the beginning of the retreat, I was able to practice the jhanas I had already accessed, but once the Path started I lost access to everything but the first 4. After the fruition, I had access to the jhanas again, including some new ones. It was a pretty interesting six days.

The only thing I would do differently in the future (and my husband agress with this) is to try and arrange a telephone interview or two with a teacher during the retreat. When times got tough, I only had access to my "internalized Kenneth," who was very helpful but not nearly as helpful as Kenneth himself. I hope someone out there finds this useful and I look forward to hearing from anyone who cares to comment.
Naomi

I spoke to Naomi on the telephone last night for a post-retreat interview. My preliminary assessment is that the Path she completed was Third. I say this because it appears that she has accessed one or more new jhanas above the eighth, a feat that signals 3rd Path, also called the path of the anagami or "non-returner."

A note of clarification: Naomi and I weren't able to talk while she was on retreat because I was also on retreat last week. Otherwise, we would have scheduled telephone interviews during her retreat.

A technical note: Naomi describes an interesting and not uncommon situation with regard to jhanas. She was regularly accessing 8 jhanas before the retreat, then found that suddenly she had only four. This happens when a yogi finishes up what I call "review phase B," in which each sitting involves moving up and down through every jhana previously attained, beginning with the first, and begins a new "developmental phase," where the yogi has to painstaking work her way up through the ñanas again. This culminates in fruition, which opens up some new territory or stabilizes some old territory. In this case, a new path and two new jhanas appeared. "Review phase A" happens just after completing a new Progress of Insight and looks like this: rising up through the ñanas, the yogi gets to the 11th ñana, experiences fruition, then finds herself back in the 4th ñana. The cycle during this phase is (using ñana numbers) 4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,4,5,6, etc. The three patterns of 1) developmental, 2) review A, and 3) review B cover most of what happens during Progress of Insight meditation. Pre-1st Path yogis know only the developmental phase; they are still working their way up toward the first fruition. They are always moving up and down between the 1st ñana and the highest ñana they have attained to date.

"I completed a Path during the retreat, much to my own surprise. "

Congratulations on your successful retreat!

Thank you for the encoraging words. And I'm glad that Kenneth clarified that he was also on retreat. I should have mentioned that. I didn't mean to imply that he wouldn't or couldn't do telephone interviews.

Hello Naomi,
Congratulations, and thank you for sharing this info about your home retreat!
It's wonderful to hear that you and your husband share this as a mutual interest.

I hope you don't mind if I ask - Do you have kids or household pets? If so, did you make special arrangements for their care?
For me, this (family and pets) is one of the biggest challenges in trying to do an at home retreat. The most I've been able to do is a mini retreat of 10 - 12 hrs.

Mudita & Upekka,
- Tina

Thanks, Tina. No, we don't have kids or pets at home any more and that really helps. I think we could have managed with cats, but dogs would have been more of a challenge for sure. One option (if you can find family and pet care) would be to do a house-sitting retreat. I have a friend who travels a lot and she has repeatedly suggested that I could retreat at her house while she was away. The timing has never worked out for me, but I think it would probably work pretty well.