Dedicating the merit, or does our practice help others?

I read the advice of a Japanese Zen teacher to a student who had dreams or visions that his recently departed mother was struggling in the bardo. The teacher suggested dedicating the merit of his sittings to her. Since a number of people dear or near to me often are struggling, I started regularly dedicating the merit of each sitting a few years ago to particular people (or pets suffering old age, decline and death. I pray that in future lives there karma will develop into bodhicitta). Also whenever I come upon a dying animal I chant Buddha, Dharma, Sangha to it at least internally (from a story of a Tibetan teacher who goes to the zoo to do that). I try to hold these ideas loosely as placeholders for something I don't understand, and possibly imaginary, but hope it will help anyway. Usually I pray that the Dharma will hold someone and guide them to more directly find their own Dharma path through the sometimes terrible problems they face.

Anyone else had any experience with that kind of thing? See any problems with it. Do you think our practice helps those we live with? (edit: I have a lot of family experience with organized, systematic prayer for others as a primary spiritual practice.)

"Do you think our practice helps those we live with?"

Yes, especially in the long run.

As for the other things you mention I believe things like praying, incantations and the like, most of which are placebo inducing things, are all okay. Placebo effects are still real effects.

I come from a over a decade of being very devoted to the Buddha's teachings and even though i am quite anti-speculation these days, I still "cling" to some of the practices that I adopted while immersed in it all. There is the tradition of donating and transferring the merits you make to friends and family that have passed on, not just in this life, but supposedly relatives from past lives too. The biggest merit making act that is in some sutta or other in the Pali canon, is the act of donating food to the sangha, to buddha and the arhats. Then when you did this you transferred all your merits to your relos. There is a sutta with Anathapindika the rich guy from Savasthi who donated to the buddha and then shared his merits with his relatives who were stuck in the ghost realm.

Regardless if this is a placebo effect, we don't really know if it is true or not. Maybe it works, maybe it doesn't. Who knows what is true and what isn't true in all those stories. I prefer to believe it is true as I often think of my grandfather and others who have passed on. When I first transferred some dosh to Kenneth, I shared the merits with my dead relatives, especially my grandad, who I adored. Regardless if there is something to it, it really honours their memory.

Why not? If it makes you into a more compassionate, considerate, generous person, then consider it a part of sila training; Training in being a better human being. I am in no way saying you should start giving to arahats. That's silly. I'm saying in whatever meritorious endeavor you set out on and do, like going for and getting 1st path for example, a kind word to someone, donating to a charity, noting for 1 hour straight without stop, you can share your merits or awesome dhamma dhatu/vibrations you accumulate (and you DO accumulate some dhamma dhatu) with those you love and then all of us miserable beings. METTA FOR ALL!!!!!! WOOOOOOOT!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-- DEDICATED TO NIK

Hehehe, Mike, you might wanna cut up that WOOT a bit.
A correction, it wasn't Anathapindika it was King Bimbisara who donated to the sangha and shared his merits with his relos.

Here is a link to the story. www.usamyanmar.net/Buddha/.../Share%20Me...Your%20Relatives.pdf

[when did all these message boxes go all widescreen?]

Until I recently heard a 'dedication of merit' explanation that made sense to me, I never did it except as required
during group practice. But I heard someone point out that it is a way of reminding ourselves, and acknowledging
the simple fact: nothing we do is truly 'by ourselves' or influences only ourselves.

And then I remembered that the single most impressive thing to me in the Buddha 'enlightenment story' was his
saying, 'Today I and all beings attain perfect enlightenment.' That struck me as wonderfully different from earlier
yogis saying 'I am That.' It also seemed to me to reflect more accurately the felt-sense of the event, just as the
Zen expression for satori-- that the practitioner 'became intimate.'

Hmm-- now that I think of it, 'dedication of merit' is one of those practices that can be seen as a kind of 'beginner
practice'-- but can also be seen as 'the last practice', the practice of enlightenment itself.

I see this as related to the resolution thread,

I also like to dedicate it to people I think I have had conflict with in the past

This is the dedication I enjoy using. I listened to Bhikkhu Bodhi use it at the end of his recorded Dhamma talks over and over until it eventually stuck.

Akasattha ca bhummattha
Deva naga mahiddhika
Punnam tam anumoditva
Ciram rakkhantu loka-sasanam

Ettavata ca amhehi
Sambhatam punna sampadam
Sabbe Deva anumodantu
Sabba sampatti siddhiya

..

Translation:

May all beings inhabiting space and earth
Devas and Nagas of mighty influance
having shared this merit
long and protect the Dhamma.

May all beings share this merit,
which I have thus acquired.
May it contribute greatly to their happiness.

Resolutions, Merit Dedications... they all fall under a category of things which seem to me to be the Buddhist form of prayer. I see nothing wrong with these practices and I know they and more direct forms of prayer (even not directed toward a diety) have helped me in the past... interesting talk about prayer and its place in Buddhism given by New Zealand born Ajahn Munindo

aruno.org//index.php?option=com_content&...onid=3&id=5&Itemid=9 (Talk 10 down the list)

The closest I get to this is in the general attitude that I hope and plan for any progress that I make in sila, concentration, vipassana, and the 2nd & 3rd gears to be helpful for the world in general, not only to myself.

I do not find it necessary to spend time dedicating the goodness of these acts to the benefit of the world because I think that these acts are naturally beneficial. Well, vipassana is beneficial as long as the dark night is handled with something at least resembling skillfulness.

That said, I find "dedicating the merit" types of meditation to be generally pretty cool. It's pleasant to remember how the enlightenment process can be helpful to so many beings, and this can help with having the resolve to do the practices that work on the enlightenment process. Who says one can't draw inspiration from both the "hinayana" generosity and morality teachings as well as the mahayana and vajrayana teachings? Perhaps the combination of those three approaches to enlightenment is the REAL triple gem... Or maybe the three-speed transmission? =)

Anyway, merit sharing is cool in my book, even if I haven't seen sufficient reason to believe that anything metaphysical is happening. I've heard some people complain that Christians are taught to go out on missions and help impoverished and disadvantaged people, and Muslims are required to give alms to the poor, whereas Buddhists can get away with just imagining that they love and help people. But I don't find that argument realistic. I can verify that by "imagining" (read: "Concentrating on") love and compassion and generosity, I can behave more lovingly, compassionately, and generously in the external world. So it makes sense that by concentrating on the wide-reaching benefits of enlightenment practices, which transcend the individual, ones enlightenment practices can be more beneficial and wide-reaching.

'Panning back' a bit for the more inclusive view, this puts me in mind of Hillel:

"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And when I am for myself, what am 'I'? And if not now, when?"

"Today I and all beings attain perfect enlightenment"<---This is infinite, instant, spontaneous, everlasting, omnipresent and infinitesimal dedication of merit.

Dedication of merit for beginners is an antidote against ego clinging to spiritual attainments. If you attain benefit in practice, this benefit can be used to establish "self" again. To avoid that, as beginners we dedicate the merit.

Also, Dedication of merit, when done repeatedly, produces wholesome inertia. It is this type of inertia that makes it easy for us to synchronize ourselves with impermanence. For merit is also impermanent. Clinging to merit defiles merit.

Dedication of merit is wholesome unclingingness to merit.

There is something interesting buried away in the stats somewhere regarding real-life people who have unfortunately found themselves in real-life situations where they were not likely to survive; be they stranded on a deserted island, lost in hostile terrain, adrift at sea. etc. I can't recall the exact source, but someone decided to take a close look at the personalities of the people who survived in those types of situations as opposed to people in similar circumstances who did not survive, and an interesting trend emurged... It turns out that people who survived in those impossible situations where almost always people who were trying to survive for the sake of someone other than themselves; whether it was to get help for a friend who was depending on them, or for their own children who needed to see them again, etc.

So yeah, durring the study a definite trend emmurged that it tended to be the people who where not in it exclusively for themselves who were the ones who made it... I think that is very telling.

In Sri Lanka, it is a practice to offer merit after a meritorious deed, be it , offering of alms,offering of a sermon, or simply offering flowers to the Buddha. It is said that when our parents are alive, it is a duty to look after them when they are aged and feeble, and after their death, to offer alms and transfer merit to them.

It is also mentioned in sermons, that not all types of beings can accept merit that is being offered. The beings in the Deva realms and in the ghost realms
( Peta yoni ) can accept merit.

However, beings in the Animal World, the Demon world,(Asura -Yoni) ,and the Hell worlds can not accept merit. The same for beings born in the Human world.

Most of you may wonder, if there is no guarantee that our relatives will benefit by us offering merit, then what is the point of offering merit? Well, maybe, our relatives in this life may not benefit by this, but there are relatives in other births, who can benefit by this offering.

I usually offer merit by saying, may all relatives, from the beginning of Samsara, accept this merit, May they be happy, may they attain Nibbana.


with metta

Upekha

"There is something interesting buried away in the stats somewhere regarding real-life people who have unfortunately found themselves in real-life situations where they were not likely to survive; be they stranded on a deserted island, lost in hostile terrain, adrift at sea. etc. I can't recall the exact source, but someone decided to take a close look at the personalities of the people who survived in those types of situations as opposed to people in similar circumstances who did not survive, and an interesting trend emurged... It turns out that people who survived in those impossible situations where almost always people who were trying to survive for the sake of someone other than themselves; whether it was to get help for a friend who was depending on them, or for their own children who needed to see them again, etc.

So yeah, durring the study a definite trend emmurged that it tended to be the people who where not in it exclusively for themselves who were the ones who made it... I think that is very telling."

That's an interesting point, Mark.
I watch the TV show "I Shouldn't Be Alive," which is a documentary program about incredible survival stories. It's almost always the case that thoughts of family are what drive people to push on and not, say, let themselves drown or just give up by falling asleep in the snow and ice. Now, the real question is whether metta practice would help during a bear attack!
Didn't the Buddha divert a rampaging elephant with metta?

It may be my years of Goenka chanting in my ear and him going on and on about metta dhatu and nibbana dhatu and vibrations this and vibrations that but I believe in the power of vibrations....great name for a band...The Power of Vibrations!. Ha!

Try this, start generatiing metta vibes within. If you are aware of the subtle flow of the subtlest vibrations you should experience a change in the frequency of those vibrations and their pleasantness should grow. You can get to at least 1st jhana doing metta practice. It's all vibrations. Ever been to a hospital full of sick people? I always sense an unpleasant feeling when I got to hospitals, lot's of suffering there. Or perhaps when you walk into the room where someone is so agitated and then you sense that agitation? Vibrations!!!! And vibrations can travel throught the air...haha...now I'm speculating...that's my Goenka conditioning speaking. But vibrations are like radio waves?

Try this experiment. Generate a whole bunch of metta for someone you are about to talk to. Then just start talking to them. VERSUS Generate nothing and then just talk to them. I always see a difference in the way , obviously, how I talk to them, but also how they respond to me. Maybe it has nothing to do with vibrations and all about visual cues but I have done the experiment and tried to have the same "face" each time. One without any metta generated, and the other full of pleasant vibey metta vibes. I prefer to think I am affecting the "air" and vibes of the room when I do this. It always seems to work.

Let's all experiment now, Let's all send my back, which is killing me, some metta. Let's see if it can heal me.

Back vibes sent!

May your back be easy, may it have what it needs, may it be afforded kindness and consideration, may it uphold the liberation of all bodies...

"I I prefer to think I am affecting the "air" and vibes of the room when I do this. It always seems to work.

Let's all experiment now, Let's all send my back, which is killing me, some metta. Let's see if it can heal me. "

Nikolai, I hope your back is better! My parents, both clergy, have led Christian meditation and prayer groups for decades and have many accounts such as terminal illnesses healing. Maybe the placebo effect is shared accross people? 5 years ago, just as I was preparing to move across the country, a team at a leading university medical center, after repeated $ hi-tech tests, assured me that I had an aortal aneurism that would sooner than later require surgery with 5% chance of mortality. My mother's prayer group focused their prayers on me for weeks. The MDs told me aneurisms don't "get better", they're like hernias that must be surgically repaired. When I landed in a city with another leading university medical center, I was tested again in prep for surgery and, what do you know, the aneurism was way better. Now it didn't need surgery any time soon. My cardiologist had all the original cat scan, MRI and ultra sound results. He offered no explanation. Naturally, I was very happy but not profoundly surprised. That kind of thing seems to happen around people who focus their energies that way. (And I was originally drafted to spiritual path by some kind of shared, group-focus A&P type episode.)

With some kind of "high-functioning autism" profile, I tend to dread check out counters; for some reason my learned social behaviors (that work pretty well at work) are always seen through by cashiers who know I'm not really doing it even though I sincerely want to be sociable (shortage of mirror neurons, they say). Lack of social effectiveness has channeled any altruism into sitting, hoping that will help. Last year I went to my 1st 1-week metta retreat, worked pretty hard, and had my 1st heart-chakra kind of opening experience. The first couple of days back in the world I felt busting with unfamiliar heart energy (and felt like I resided in my heart for a few weeks rather my head). A startling thing is that cashiers seemed drawn to me like they found me a source of something good and appealing. Blew me away. It was disappointing to see that charisma quickly fade, but very interesting. Not the 1st time I've noticed that spiritual energy can be bigger than the limitations of the vessel. Doesn't it seem though if cultivating metta and good wishes can have such impact, how much might it be helpful in unknown ways to get 1st and other Paths? I'm pretty sure that Skyping with Kenneth for awhile has a big energetic impact. What about if one of your close, loved ones becomes a vessel of awakening? Hopefully that would make up for all the time they spent off sitting on their butts! Edit: I can imagine that might best be left to the unknown, to make sure there is not identification with ideas or expectations about it.

""Today I and all beings attain perfect enlightenment"<---This is infinite, instant, spontaneous, everlasting, omnipresent and infinitesimal dedication of merit.

Dedication of merit for beginners is an antidote against ego clinging to spiritual attainments. If you attain benefit in practice, this benefit can be used to establish "self" again. To avoid that, as beginners we dedicate the merit.

"

Hey! I like this a lot-- it really fleshes out my hazy intuitive take on matters.

Thanks, Mr. APriori!

Metta practice can do amazing things. From my own experiences with it I can't say whether it helps others far away, but I do know for certain that when I do it others around me can tell the difference, and I generate very different and positive reactions in people.

Another benefit to the practice is that it has helped me get out of my own narrow little world pretty quickly when others are suffering. To give a really basic example, when someone I love is short with me or cranky, I immediately recognize my own crankiness as empathy, and not as something to take out on them. Holding the discomfort of that feeling and wishing myself happiness, I relate to the other person in a totally different way. No longer reactive. No longer conditioned by selfishness.

When you think about it, and Roomy hinted at this, a strong foundation of Metta may be the key to finally getting over the "self" and seeing through illusion. It may not be sufficient for enlightenment, but my guess is that it is strongly needed.

"Another benefit to the practice is that it has helped me get out of my own narrow little world pretty quickly when others are suffering. To give a really basic example, when someone I love is short with me or cranky, I immediately recognize my own crankiness as empathy, and not as something to take out on them. Holding the discomfort of that feeling and wishing myself happiness, I relate to the other person in a totally different way. No longer reactive. No longer conditioned by selfishness.

When you think about it, and Roomy hinted at this, a strong foundation of Metta may be the key to finally getting over the "self" and seeing through illusion. It may not be sufficient for enlightenment, but my guess is that it is strongly needed.
"

This, too, is wonderful, Ron! Especially your brilliantly specific 'really basic example.' All due praise to the 'really basic'-- it is often precisely what is lacking and impeding our practice.

The more I sit with this discussion, the more it reveals-- I'm seeing that it is the 'way in' to the Mahayana, with its Bodhisattva aspirations; and it is the Dharma-jewel hidden in the apparently social impositions of 'ethics' practice.

and I'm remembering that when my father died-- when I had renewed my meditation practice and recently encountered a description of 'metta' practice, which I could only remember as 'May you be free of suffering; may your heart be at peace'-- I sat with him, and my brother and sister, throughout the 3 days of the process. Keeping this phrase going in my heart for the duration seemed the practice that met the occasion.

There were all kinds of reconciliation that had been needed. I have never been in a more powerful meditation realm than that hospital room became...

postscript--

There DO seem to be stories indicating that there is literally NO practice too simple, basic, elementary, devoid of intellectual or philosophical elaboration, or lacking hours of arduous repetition-- to incite enlightenment.

Call me naive [or, for that matter, call me Ishmael]-- but I suspect these stories are true.