AnthonyYeshe's Practice Notes 3

""It was my understanding that the stratum of mind do not change when in 3rd gear, so maybe I was not in the right mindset." -AnthonyYeshe

Hi Anthony,

I would say it differently than that. First, keep in mind that there isn't any one state that is referred to by 3rd Gear. Instead, think of 3rd Gear (and all the Gears) as a way to categorize practices. 1st Gear practices objectify, 2nd Gear practices inquire, and 3rd Gear practices surrender. With that in mind, it does often happen that while doing a 3rd Gear practice the attention is on something other than strata of mind, so people tend not to notice which stratum of mind they are in (if indeed the concept of strata of mind even applies when the mind is very diffuse).

Since the three gears are intended as a loose conceptual framework to help us understand how seemingly contradictory practices can all contribute to the mental development we often call awakening, it's possible to mix and match gears. For example, it's possible to do noting practice, which is primarily aimed at (1st Gear) objectification, from a 3rd Gear (surrender) point of view. In that case, you note while being as non-manipulative as possible. This, by the way, is a really beautiful way of noting, and probably where all noting must eventually end up, even though at at various places along the way it's tempting to use noting as a way of changing or improving our experience."

Thanks for the clarification Kenneth,that makes sense.

No time this morning for preliminary Tummo practice.

50min evening sit:

Today I made the intention to become more fluid in my 3 gear practice. My mind and body were both feeling a bit tense so I started with a few minutes of watching the breath and then noting out loud body sensations. I increased the tempo of noting and included thoughts and mind states with an attached vedana to my body sensation noting.

@ about 15min in I found myself in a calm and stable equanimity. I dropped noting as noticing phenomena took on a more autopilot mode. Body became subtle and mind expanded. I naturally shifted to asking "who am I' or "who is noticing these phenomena" The witness became the forefront of awareness. I did notice the face tensing up and this caused a shift back down to just noticing the body and then back up to inquiring again....

@around 25min in: This eventually led to a relaxing of the proprioceptive selfing and the natural shift was to just rest in 3rd gear. Third gear was more relaxed and I had more patience in the practice and less checking in to see if I was doing it "right" or not. Just rest and a sort of unfolding experience of surrender. I had a few downshifts back down to 2nd and 1st and back up to 3rd again with no resistance to having to downshift (which is new for me).

Towards the end of the sit I had an inclination to call up a few fruitions via the eye flicker technique. Ended the sit feeling very calm and chilled out... body is relaxed too with a subtle pleasant vibration in my chest and neck.

Peace

50 min evening sit:

Started with a few minutes of focus, then felt open to starting off with 3rd gear. Mostly I rested in being. Some thoughts and manipulation occurred but not much mental or body tension so I didn't feel the need to downshift today. I just smiled and let go again and again.

No sits past 4 days. Got busy, lost momentum. Still I noticed some inner transformation occurring. I am becoming more automatic in noticing tension arise and then instantly releasing it. There is a noticeable energy flow re-working process going on in my being. It feels like the natural coming together of my Vipassana practice and the energy work of the beginning stages of Tummo.

45min sit tonight.
Vipassana for first 30min: noting outloud, noting silently, then wordless noticing. I went up to equanimity briefly then down to Knowledge of Fear and hung out there a bit for some reason. Felt behind the scenes anxiety, like something unpleasant was about to happen. Sense of mind was very far-forward in my head with pressure filling the back of the head. I stayed with it for as long as needed. The energy opened up and I eased back to EQ. Switched to MM noting for the rest of the sit: Listening for the ships, accepting tension arising, releasing tension, having compassion for my anxiety, tensions, cravings, ect..., surrender, expansion, lightness, well being, peace, with zooming, bouncing sensations in head while listening for ships.
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Tsa Lung 15 min. Followed the Tenzin Wangyal video: vimeo.com/28258180

45min sit
Shifted through the 3 gears. Went up and down a few times. Experienced a lot of solid sensations. Aches, pains, tensions (heavy labor at work this week). There was some mental frustration and aversion arising. My overall mood was not unpleasant, however and I stayed pretty objective to it all. No blissful states or high levels of well being after this sit. My mindfulness was strong though and I am happy with that.

~25min Tummo this morning.

Went through about 10 retentions of 1-1:30min. During the last few I started to feel a rush of pleasant warmth and vibrations from my root and spine. Still trying to figure out the technique and how to hold/contract the pelvic muscles.
Felt a bit energetic later on with a few moments of warm bliss arising. My goal this week is to wake up earlier to do this practice for about 20-30min. I want to give this 2 solid weeks to see what will happen.

I felt pretty good all day, and was very productive. Maybe it was the Tummo, maybe just coincidence or placebo; time will tell.

45 evening sit:
For the first 25min I practiced concentration then noting. I think I am going through the re-wiring of the brain/ pre-baseline shift of the practice cycle. This has been building for the past several days. Previous to this I was able to coherently and effortlessly shift through jhanas and nanas and come to clear and subtle insights about 3rd gear. Lately, the mind seems like it can't find a frequency to settle in on. Its not the same as when I feel aversion to meditation, monkey mind, or boredom. Its more like spinning my wheels and not catching hold of anything stable or subtle.

I have been through this before and this time I don't feel as anxious about it. I know it will pass with consistent practice and the mind will re-wire and find frequencies it can tune to....until it hits a new plateau and starts to rewire again, lol. In reflection, this cycling is a bit tiring but no where near as maddening as third path was. I don't feel stuck on any ride. I just feel like I am on one difficult point of the overall path.

Interestingly, at about 25min in my mind gave up on making any progress at 1st gear and naturally shifted to 3rd gear on its own. It still felt out of tune, but at the same time the mind was not trying to tune in to anything. I just surrendered to the disturbance and let go of any manipulation.
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Morning 25min Tsa Lung, 30min Tummo

Did about 10 breath retentions starting with about 1 minute and increasing to 2 min during the last three retentions. Still trying to learn how to ride a bike here, i.e., drawing in the breath, holding the right posture, contracting the right muscles, letting the breath out the right way... lots to think about at once. I know it is something that will come with practice. Felt very energetic and even strong/stable today.

Evening sit, 45min:
I sat down, took a big breath and immediately noticed the room around me in vivid color and detail. I dropped my intended meditation plans and instead sat with the awareness of the room around me. Several items held my wonder and interest, and there were so many details that I never noticed before. After about 15min I closed my eyes and surrendered the the unfolding of moments. The core of my mind felt calm and stable yet my body and surface thoughts were erupting in unpleasant vibration and tensions. I switched between surrendering to this tension without manipulation and then actively trying to release it and relax. The waves of unpleasantness seemed unlimited however, and I was just left with having to accept the situation and not resist it.
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