Monson notes III

Ahh equanimity, you came back. I've missed you so.

strange, i'm going through a time right now when pay ing close attention, looking, mindfulness, etc. feels very clunky and artificial and even maybe inaccurate.
i'm finding that instead i'm just letting go and letting objects present themselves to me in whatever way they happen to arise
i know this is a subtle, almost miniscule difference but it feels like a learning, or just a basic change in my style of looking -- less 'me' involved in the activity

"i'm finding that instead i'm just letting go and letting objects present themselves to me in whatever way they happen to arise"-telecaster

Good. Go with it as long as it lasts. All you want to do is see things clearly. During certain stages of the practice, this happens automatically. So the last thing you would do during this phase is to start chasing objects around; just let the objects present themselves to you as you've described. If you feel like noting, note. If not, just notice.

I've not decided to not do anything at least for now.

I don't know what's possible.

While I'm not sitting as much, I'm still sitting once or twice a day and doing basic vipassana in combination with a sort of zazen -- which is for me to do as little as possible while staying aware of as much as possible.
I made a resolution to not have any more frutions until I have the frutions for the next path, whatever that is, so my sits aren't really going to the cessation place, they are more of a gentle exploration of detail.
I admit I have no spiritual ambitions right now in terms of objective progress. None.
To get to the point of this post:
My main practice right now is focused on my moment to moment activties; my interactions with people, my interactions with myself, my interactions with objects, with society, with the world.
How am I treating people and how does it feel? How am I treating myself and how does that feel? what is the next right thing to do to create peace? How does Mike Monson create peace in this moment? And this one? Can I live each moment so well and so completely that I really am able to look around me with clean, fresh, accurate eyes? If so, how do I do that?
Koans. Constant koans.
it's nice.
It doesn't feel like "insight disease" right now, it feels like "life 101."

Nice.

Pure awesomeness, Mike.

The entire universe is always right here in all it's glory and permutations, just like the bright shinning sun. Our minds though can cause cloulds, moons, or even entire planets to block the brightness of the universe.
This isn't always bad, though, because while basking in a warm sun is pleasant, it's never fun to get a bad sunburn.
Freedom is knowing both how and when to bask and frolic and use the sun's light to see, and in knowing how to avoid sun burn and damage to one's eyes that can cause great pain and distort one's vision.

I'm not sure that all worked just right.
What I mean is, bright true reality is always right here and we, each of us, willingly or unconsciously do this things contstantly that block our ability to experience this.
Practice can be learnng how to stop doing those things that hide us away from awesome loving shining everything, but, in a way that doesn't bring on too much too fast and just end up distorting things all over again.