MuMuWu's Practice Journal

To see the world in a grain of sand
And heaven in a wildflower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.

He who binds himself to a joy
Does the winged life destroy:
He who kisses the joy as it flies
Lives in eternity's sunrise.
--William Blake

i.imgur.com/DlASn.jpg

WOW - contemplating the variety of forms in this is blowing my mind. Look at the colors! Magnificent.

"Ananda, you have not yet understood that all the defiling objects that appear, all the
illusory, ephemeral phenomena, spring up in the very spot where they also come to an end. Their phenomena aspects are illusory and false, but their nature is in truth the bright substance of wonderful enlightenment. Thus it is throughout, up to the five skandhas and the six entrances, to the twelve places and the eighteen realms; the union and mixture of various causes and conditions account for their illusory and false existence, and the separation and dispersion of the causes and conditions result in their illusory and false extinction. Who would have thought that production and extinction, coming and going are fundamentally the eternal wonderful light of the Tathagata, the unmoving, all-pervading perfection, the wonderful nature of True Suchness! If within the true and eternal nature one seeks coming and going, confusion and enlightenment, or birth and death, one will never find them."

- Buddha (Shurangama Sutra)

Dzogchen master Longchenpa:
...All phenomena are primordially pure and enlightened, so it is unborn and unceasing, inconceivable and inexpressible.
In the ultimate sphere purity and impurity are naturally pure and phenomena are the great equal perfection, free from conception.
Since there is no bondage and liberation, there is no going, coming or dwelling.
Appearance and emptiness are conventions, apprehended and apprehender are like maya (a magical apparition).
The happiness and suffering of samsara and nirvana are like good and bad dreams.
From the very moment of appearing, its nature is free from elaboration.
From it (the state of freedom from elaboration), the very interdependent causation of the great arising and cessation appears like a dream, maya, an optical illusion, a city of the gandharvas an echo, and a reflection, having no reality. All the events such as arising, etc., Are in their true nature unborn.
So they will never cease nor undergo any changes in the three periods of time.
They did not come from anywhere and they did not go anywhere.
They will not stay anywhere: they are like a dream and maya.
A foolish person is attached to phenomena as true, and apprehends them as gross material phenomena, "i" and "self," whereas they are like a maya-girl who disappears when touched.
They are not true because they are deceiving and act only in appearance.
The spheres of the six realms of beings and the pure lands of the buddhas, also are not aggregations of atoms, but merely the self-appearances of beings' minds.
For example, in a dream buddhas and sentient beings appear as real, endowed with
inconceivable properties.

However, when one awakens, they were just a momentary object of the mind.
In the same way should be understood all the phenomena of samsara and nirvana.
There is no separate emptiness apart from apparent phenomena.
It is like fire and heat, the qualities of fire.
The notion of their distinctness is a division made by mind.
Water and the moon's reflection in water are indivisibly one in the pool.
Likewise, appearances and emptiness are one in the great dharmata.
These appearances are unborn from the beginning, and they are the dharmakaya.
They are like reflections, naturally unstained and pure.
The mind's fabricating their existence or nonexistence is an illusion,
So do not conceptualize whatever appearances arise...

-- above and previous post quoted from "Who Am I" - AnEternalNow

Q: At what point does one experience reality?
M: Experience is of change, it comes and goes. Reality is not
an event, it cannot be experienced. It is not perceivable in the
same way as an event is perceivable. If you wait for an event to
take place, for the coming of reality, you will wait for ever, for rea-
lity neither comes nor goes. It is to be perceived, not expected.
It is not to be prepared for and anticipated. But the very longing
and search for reality is the movement, operation, action of rea-
lity. All you can do is to grasp the central point, that reality is not
an event and does not happen and whatever happens, what-
ever comes and goes, is not reality. See the event as event only,
the transient as transient, experience as mere experience and
you have done all you can. Then you are vulnerable to reality, no
longer armoured against it, as you were when you gave reality
to events and experiences. But as soon as there is some like or
dislike, you have drawn a screen.

- I AM That Page 190

Q: Would you say that reality expresses itself in action rather
than in knowledge? Or, is it a feeling of sorts?
M: Neither action, nor feeling, nor thought express reality.
There is no such thing as an expression of reality. You are intro-
ducing a duality where there is none. Only reality is, there is no-
thing else. The three states of waking, dreaming and sleeping
are not me and I am not in them. When I die, the world will say '”
'˜Oh, Maharaj is dead!' But to me these are words without con-
tent; they have no meaning. When the worship is done before
the image of the Guru, all takes place as if he wakes and bathes
and eats and rests, and goes for a stroll and returns, blesses all
and goes to sleep. All is attended to in minutest details and yet
there is a sense of unreality about it all. So is the case with me.
All happens as it needs, yet nothing happens. I do what seems
to be necessary, but at the same time I know that nothing is
necessary, that life itself is only a make-belief.

- I Am That, Page 191

In the Anguttara Nikaya (A.I.8-10) the Buddha states:[6] "Luminous, monks, is the mind. And it is defiled by incoming defilements."[7] The discourses indicate that the mind's natural radiance can be made manifest by meditation.[8]

Ajahn Mun, the leading figure behind the modern Thai Forest Tradition, comments on this verse:
The mind is something more radiant than anything else can be, but because counterfeits '“ passing defilements '“ come and obscure it, it loses its radiance, like the sun when obscured by clouds. Don't go thinking that the sun goes after the clouds. Instead, the clouds come drifting along and obscure the sun. So meditators, when they know in this manner, should do away with these counterfeits by analyzing them shrewdly... When they develop the mind to the stage of the primal mind, this will mean that all counterfeits are destroyed, or rather, counterfeit things won't be able to reach into the primal mind, because the bridge making the connection will have been destroyed. Even though the mind may then still have to come into contact with the preoccupations of the world, its contact will be like that of a bead of water rolling over a lotus leaf.[9]

Quote taken from Nikolai Halay from a thread on thehamiltonproject.blogspot.com/p/hamilton-project-forum.html

Continuing to notice that I am aware (having an experience) seems to be doing something very positive. There is a greater and greater sense of uninterrupted continuity to my experience. Any movement to fabricate is seen with much greater clarity along with it's consequences.

Yesterday, for example, there was much sadness in the body, a few tears even. Noticing that I was aware brought instant relief. It was clear that I could easily have a very direct, clear, peaceful, content experience or I could narrow down and focus on sadness and feed it.

More and more agency seems to be dropping away. Any activity I look at seems to be occurring on it's own. More and more I am able to simply notice awareness and allow things to unfold naturally.

I've never felt as content and simple as I do as of late. I've also never felt this open (in terms of the focus of awareness). There is very little, to no narrowing of the field of attention as more and more the narrowing is seen to be something happening within a wider field of awareness.

One exercise I've been playing with is noticing that the periphery is always present in experience and then to try and do something that will make the periphery go away. I can't. The idea of distraction and not being focused are on the level of mind only, awareness is never restricted it seems. The illusion of distraction is based on memory and not having recorded what you "missed". It's similar to a dream where you know you were having an experience but can't remember it in hindsight.

Get these:

www.tibetantreasures.com/Padma_Publishin..._Way_of_Abiding.html
www.tibetantreasures.com/Padma_Publishin...ce_of_Phenomena.html
www.tibetantreasures.com/Padma_Publishin...th_Instructions.html

The Precious Treasury of Basic Space of Phenomena is out of stock but I think you can get it used (although probably very expensive).

Best books on Dzogchen semde I have ever bought

"I've never felt as content and simple as I do as of late. I've also never felt this open (in terms of the focus of awareness). There is very little, to no narrowing of the field of attention as more and more the narrowing is seen to be something happening within a wider field of awareness.
"

Nice!

I'm curious about the narrowing of attention. Could you talk a bit more about it? I've sometimes seen that happening, and I'm curious if I'm seeing the same thing you are.

While driving on the highway when traffic is light, I can often have a wide panoramic attention. But, if a car enters the highway ahead of me, my attention will narrow to focus on the entering car, and on any possible adjustments I need to make to avoid it. After the situation is over (and if I remember), I can return to the panoramic attention.

Any similarities to your situation?

Very much so.

See if you can notice how even when it seems like attention is narrow, the periphery is still there.

"Get these:

www.tibetantreasures.com/Padma_Publishin..._Way_of_Abiding.html
www.tibetantreasures.com/Padma_Publishin...ce_of_Phenomena.html
www.tibetantreasures.com/Padma_Publishin...th_Instructions.html

The Precious Treasury of Basic Space of Phenomena is out of stock but I think you can get it used (although probably very expensive).

Best books on Dzogchen semde I have ever bought "

Thanks for this!

One (at least) seems to be online as an ebook pdf if you search for it

The Beach Boys - Surf's Up


"A choke of grief
Heart hardened I
Beyond belief a broken man too tough to cry

Surf's Up
Aboard a tidal wave ( thehamiltonproject.blogspot.com/2011/10/...ent-riding-wave.html )
Come about hard and join
The young and often spring you gave

I heard the word
Wonderful thing
A children's song

Child is the father of the man"

"The knowingness '˜I am' is gradually felt by the child and this is followed by the mind. This '˜I amness' or the feeling before the formation of the mind, is the ignorant-child-principle, termed the '˜balkrishna' state. This '˜balkrishna' principle has great potential. Here '˜bal' means the food essence, child-body, and '˜krishna' means '˜non-knowing', that is, ignorance. But it has the potential to receive, respond and react. I am not in this state, the child principle, '˜balkrishna', as I abide in the Absolute."

"In the first few years the primary concept '˜I am' was there, but in a dormant condition. Later on it started knowing itself. The '˜jnani' state is like the child, when the child was not knowing itself. The apparatus through which that knowingness expresses itself is now quite different, but the principle is the same."

"Concepts come into the sense of being '˜I am' because of the vital breath that causes the mind flow. Mind means words, so thoughts are there '“ they are the concepts. Look at your root, the child consciousness, and finish it off."

"Understand that it is not the individual that has consciousness; it is the consciousness which assumes innumerable forms. That something which is born or which will die is purely imaginary. It is the child of a barren woman. In the absence of this basic concept '˜I am', there is no thought, there is no consciousness."

-Nisargadatta

"Very much so.

See if you can notice how even when it seems like attention is narrow, the periphery is still there."


If we're talking about the same thing, then visually, I see it sort of like this:

www.hypergurl.com/blog/blurbackground2.jpg
www.dannyst.com/blogimg/article01/frame03.jpg

In these shots, the depth of field is exaggerated, but you get the idea. This way of seeing can get pretty pronounced and three-dimensional at times. I blame that on direct mode, but it seems more and more noticeable in everyday life these days.

Andy,

Have a look at the relationship between eye focus and attention.

Often things appear blurry if we aren't looking right at them, but are instead just shifting our attention to them (with the eyes locked ahead). When you feel dull and things look dull, this is often why (your eyes don't follow your attention).

Another thing is to notice that depth of field is related to how close or far you are from objects. While driving, everything is generally clear and open (far away). Even when the periphery is blurry, it is still there.

Been following the instructions posted here: bit.ly/sO5FRM

Which seem to make more sense to me now since my aha moment following simply recognizing I AM aware over and over again.

I've been tuning into the 4 aspects xsurf mentions with great results. "1) the aspect of impersonality, 2) the aspect of the degree of luminosity, 3) the aspect of dissolving the need to re-confirm and abide in I AMness and understanding why such a need is irrelevant, 4) the aspect of experiencing effortlessness."

Yesterday it really hit me how thought was claiming all these experiences for itself. Thought would say "I am still aware" and then the experience would become more direct. However, last night thought said "I am only thought, I cannot be aware. I am not having this experience, I am not you."

After that, thought really died down. As a result the luminosity aspect seems extra bright today (as well as last night.)

It is also becoming more clear that in the absence of the idea of a universal awareness, or consciousness experiencing itself, things really just are what they are.

"Don't try to be aware. You ARE Pure Awareness shining brighter than the sun. Just stop avoiding your true nature. Stop denying the undeniable.
There is no need to maintain or develop awareness. You can't add or subtract from Total Brilliance. Why do you attempt to put effort in lighting up a candle when you are already standing under the blazing sun?"

"There is nothing you can understand about Awareness. If that's what you want to do, forget it, give up. Awareness is not a thought; it is the SEEING of the thought. A thought that momentarily comes and goes from the Brilliant Awareness will never be able to grasp it.
Your true nature is not within the realm of objects, and thus not within the field of
knowledge, like an eye that sees but cannot see itself, a knife that cuts but cannot cut itself.
You can't 'know' Awareness, for you ARE Awareness, and you can only BE Awareness."

- An Eternal Now, "Who Am I"

"I remember that thoughts of losing awareness used to happen quite often for me in the
past. But this is all seen to be totally baseless and ridiculous nowadays.
All thoughts of "I lost awareness" or "I need more effort to maintain awareness" or anything along that line implies having had some 'recognition' or 'experience' of Awareness, but not having the Realization of Who You Are.

This is why, looking back, I think Thusness was very apt in telling me the difference between Experience and Realization last year. He said "You may have the blissful sensation or feeling of vast and open spaciousness; you may experience a non-conceptual and objectless state; you may experience the mirror like clarity but all these experiences are not Realization. There is no '˜eureka', no '˜aha', no moment of immediate and intuitive illumination that you understood something undeniable and unshakable -- a conviction so powerful that no one, not even Buddha can sway you from this realization because the practitioner so clearly sees the truth of it. It is the direct and unshakable insight of '˜You'. This is the realization that a practitioner must have in order to realize the Zen satori. You will understand clearly why it is so difficult for those practitioners to forgo this '˜I AMness' and accept the doctrine of anatta.

Actually there is no forgoing of this '˜Witness', it is rather a deepening of insight to include the non-dual, groundlessness and interconnectedness of our luminous nature. Like what Rob said, "keep the experience but refine the views"."

- An Eternal Now, "Who Am I"

Wonderful stuff!

Some musings / ponderings...

(each group is a different view)

Body
Mind
Spirit (Awareness),

Body appears in Mind
Spirit witnesses,

Body and Witness appear in Mind,

Mind only,

Mind only is a belief...

Bird chirps, dog barks, moon glows

"All dharmas are resolved in One Mind. One Mind resolves into...."
sgforums.com/forums/1728/topics/391975

"Enlightenment is the feeling/knowing that what exists is Universe/Consciousness, they are the same, U=C. Existence is itself consciousness and that is why there is something rather than nothing. This is the real state of things and because it is so natural, so simple and so obvious, we miss it daily."

www.spiritualteachers.org/norquist_article.htm

"I am this physical universe experiencing itself as a reflective, sensate human being; as me, the universe is intelligent (there is no anthropomorphic '˜Intelligence' that is creating or running existence)."

actualfreedom.com.au/richard/selectedcor...ence/sc-universe.htm

"...It is a natural thing to just give up entirely and let awareness recognize awareness as it is.

So 2nd Gear leads to 3rd Gear, and this is very much a part of Advaita Vedanta. This is what it means'”this is what it really means when Ramana Marharshi says 'the stick that stirs the fire and is eventually consumed by it.' When the Witness is consumed, you have just made the leap into 3rd Gear."
-Kenneth Folk
www.buddhistgeeks.com/2010/05/just-stop-...urrenders-to-itself/

Notice you are aware of your entire current experience right now
All changes are changes in the current experience
Notice you are aware of your entire current experience right now
Notice that you don't need to notice to be aware

"Foolish man, to whom do you know me having taught the Dhamma like this. Haven't I
taught, in various ways that consciousness is dependently arisen. Without a cause, there is no arising of consciousness. Yet you, foolish man, on account of your wrong view, you misrepresent me, as well as destroy yourself and accumulate much demerit, for which you will suffer for a long time."'

"Bhikkhus, consciousness is reckoned by the condition dependent upon which it arises. If consciousness arises on account of eye and forms, it is reckoned as eye consciousness. If on account of ear and sounds it arises, it is reckoned as ear consciousness. If on account of nose and smells it arises, it is reckoned as nose consciousness. etc. Bhikkhus, just as a fire is reckoned based on whatever that fire burns - fire ablaze on sticks is a stick fire, fire ablaze on twigs is a twig fire, fire ablaze on grass is a grass fire, fire ablaze on cowdung is a cowdung fire, fire ablaze on grain thrash is a grain thrash fire, fire ablaze on rubbish is a rubbish fire - so too is consciousness reckoned by the condition dependent upon which it arises. In the same manner consciousness arisen on account is eye and forms is eye consciousness. Consciousness arisen on account of ear and sounds is ear consciousness. Consciousness arisen on account of nose and smells is nose consciousness... etc."

www.leighb.com/mn38.htm

"Form is like a glob of foam; feeling, a bubble; perception, a mirage; fabrications, a banana tree; consciousness, a magic trick '” this has been taught by the Kinsman of the Sun. However you observe them, appropriately examine them, they're empty, void to whoever sees them appropriately."
-Buddha, Phena Sutta

"We're all looking for something to hang our hopes on, but when we really get down to the present moment, to our own experience, to clear seeing, we come to what Buddha said: "In hearing there is only hearing; no one hearing and nothing heard." There is just that moment, that hearing. You might think, "Oh, a beautiful bird." How do you know it's a bird? It might be a tape recorder. It might be bicycle brakes squeaking. In the first moment, there is just hearing, then we get busy, our minds and concepts get involved. The Buddha went through all the five senses. "In seeing there is just seeing; no one seeing and nothing seen." And so on, with tasting, touching, smelling, and thinking. Thoughts without a thinker. In thinking there is just thinking. There is just that momentary process. There is no thinker. The notion of an inner thinker is just a thought. We imagine that there is somebody thinking. It's like the Wizard of Oz. They thought there was this glorious wizard, but it was just a little man back there behind the screen, behind the veil. That's how it is with the ego. We think there's a great big monkey inside working the five windows, the five senses. Or maybe five monkeys, one for each sense; a whole chattering monkey house, which it sometimes feels like. But is there really a concrete individual or permanent soul inside at all? It seems more like that the lights are on, but no one is home!"

Lama Surya Das:
www.dzogchen.org/teachings/talks/dtalk-95may22.html

Quoted from "Who Am I?", An Eternal Now

Noting the 6 bases of consciousness (seeing, hearing, feeling, tasting, smelling, thinking) can be quite powerful. Notice how everything is simply arising in a sense door. No doer apart from the arising can be found.

Now this seems to be you observing the sense doors. Notice, however, that you are continually maintaining that view via thought, and thought is arising on it's own in a sense door. Tension is arising on it's own in a sense door.

There are merely these 6 consciousness bases arising depending on conditions.

"Perception is a path to awakening. The Buddha said all it really takes is to perceive in the right way - this will take you all the way to awakening. We can change and develop our perceptions."