awouldbehipster's practice notes (part 3)

Kylie Minogue.

Nuff said!

Practice has been simple. Recognize empty wakefulness and surrender. The mind conjures up thoughts, images, concepts. They arise and pass. The body feels pleasure, pain, numbness, rapture. They arise and pass.

The progress of insight cycles kick in. They do their thing. Cessation occurs. It just happens, and then it's over.

Empty. Empty. Empty. This. This. This. Beyond affirmation and negation.

In other words, I just sit.

"Practice has been simple. Recognize empty wakefulness and surrender. The mind conjures up thoughts, images, concepts. They arise and pass. The body feels pleasure, pain, numbness, rapture. They arise and pass.

The progress of insight cycles kick in. They do their thing. Cessation occurs. It just happens, and then it's over.

Empty. Empty. Empty. This. This. This. Beyond affirmation and negation.

In other words, I just sit."

nice

"Practice has been simple. Recognize empty wakefulness and surrender. The mind conjures up thoughts, images, concepts. They arise and pass. The body feels pleasure, pain, numbness, rapture. They arise and pass.

The progress of insight cycles kick in. They do their thing. Cessation occurs. It just happens, and then it's over.

Empty. Empty. Empty. This. This. This. Beyond affirmation and negation.

In other words, I just sit."

If envy is a fetter, consider me fettered.

"I got plenty o' nothin'
and nothin's plenty for me...'

"We need to remember that where we are going is 'here' - that any practice is simply a means to open our hearts to what is in front of us. Where we already are is the path and the goal."

This is from Jack Kornfield's book "After the Ecstasy, The Laundry." I've posted it before, I'm sure. I printed it on a small piece of paper about a year ago, and it rests at the bottom of a picture frame on my desk at work.

I used to get more irritated with teachings about how there's "nowhere to go" and that it's all about "now." Taken out of context, it sounds like such teachings advocate a lack of practice, or perhaps even consider practice to be harmful. Of course, this isn't the case (in my opinion, at least).

What is true, however, is that the belief that we've attained something isn't worth diddly squat if it keeps us from continually engaging our moment to moment experience in a fresh, open, undefined way. Attainment and practice (or more accurately, 'realization' and practice) are realities that mutually co-arise. Don't think for a second that you will get to some magical place in the future when continued meditation practice is of no benefit.

So, it really is true that where we are going is 'here' - right here, right now, with fresh eyes and an open mind. Relinquish all unhelpful* notions of "done-ness," while accepting that realization can and does occur. Live out your awakening, rather than hanging your hat on some past event or relying on the hope of some future event. The past is a memory. The future is a fantasy. What's real 'now'?

*not all notions of done-ness are unhelpful; just those that prevent further practice.

"
So, it really is true that where we are going is 'here' - right here, right now, with fresh eyes and an open mind. Relinquish all unhelpful* notions of "done-ness," while accepting that realization can and does occur. Live out your awakening, rather than hanging your hat on some past event or relying on the hope of some future event. The past is a memory. The future is a fantasy. What's real 'now'?

*not all notions of done-ness are unhelpful; just those that prevent further practice."

Way back when I was a young sprout, I used to have lines pop into my head from Nowhere; lately I've been calling them 'wisdom voiceovers'.

The one I've been remembering lately is:
'Nothing' remains--
but does not remain still.

"Way back when I was a young sprout, I used to have lines pop into my head from Nowhere; lately I've been calling them 'wisdom voiceovers'.

The one I've been remembering lately is:
'Nothing' remains--
but does not remain still."

Right

I think I heard Hokai Sobol once say that, "Emptiness is not fixed."

I'm going through a pretty massive "not knowing" phase in practice right now. It's hard to describe (for, how well can I describe what I don't know?).

One area to which this applies is that of describing the knowledge/knowing of things as they are. Though some descriptors seem useful as pointers, reality itself cannot be adequately described. The "finger pointing to the moon" cliché is applicable here. We can say that we wake up to pure awareness, or natural wakefulness, or emptiness, or whatever - but, none of those descriptors are sufficient. They fall WAY short. For me, this creates a block in trying to communicate realization to others, or to point them in the right direction. For me, analogies and conceptual pointers sound so disingenuous coming out of my mouth. I suppose it would be good for me to do it anyway, as a way to embrace the role language (however limited) plays in aiding others in awakening.

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I'm also wrestling with the existential implications of awakening. Not "what exists." Rather, what should I "do" with all of this? Are there any built-in, rational conclusions I can infer from clearly knowing reality as it is? The Mahayana ideal of the Bodhisattva is a good pointer, in stating that we continue to help others after awakening. But is that really the point, or is that just Buddhism? Is there a point? Or, does this limited expression known by others as "Jackson" still have to fumble about with decision making as long as it/he carries on as a human being? I'm inclined to more readily accept the latter, as I do not think that something should be accepted simply because it's a part of a greater tradition. So, I'm somewhat stuck (or blocked) with regard to knowing whether or not there is something I "should" do in response. Is this something I can actually know via the awakening process? I really don't know. It doesn't feel right to simply serve my own self-interest or pleasure-seeking, and yet it doesn't feel right to think that realization necessitates a full-blown commitment to serving others. Perhaps it is yet another false dichotomy I will push through one of these days. Perhaps not.

I'm certainly not looking for anyone to provide any answers. That would defeat the purpose of this line of inquiry. I do like a good discussion, though.

Thoughts?
~Jackson

After writing the above, I can see how working with koans could be helpful. Not that I think awakening is all about passing koans. I can just imagine all of the creative, expressive Zen students passing koans left and right, but who never really meet the issues head on, as they arise naturally. Nonetheless, I bet working with a good Zen teacher over an extended period (many years), and adding certain koans to the mix, or even coming up with new ones as "blocks" are discovered, could be a good thing. Right now, my life presents its own koans for me to solve. Maybe that's good enough for now.

I know Owen has spent time in the Rinzai tradition, he has told me that he knows personally at least one person who has arrived at what we call 4th path or awakening through Koan Training, I too am interested in Koans. Particularly what the post awakening Koans look like/point to...

"I too am interested in Koans. Particularly what the post awakening Koans look like/point to..." ~Clayton

From what I've heard, the koan system generally ends with morality. This is backwards from most religious training, which tends to start with morality and make it's way toward the more esoteric dimension of the teachings. To, the "post-awakening" koans are probably the kind of thing that would help me out the most right now. Just a guess.

Here are some neat ones (used in Korean Zen):
www.kwanumzen.com/misc/12gates.html

I don't think there is a more gorgeous exposition about koans, poetry, Zen, and the Christian, esoteric Jewish, and philosophical traditions than Steven Mitchell's book, "Meetings with the Archangel". I reread it every couple of years for the sheer delight of it. It has everything from the old Chan masters to Martin Buber and Meister Eckhart and Rilke. Plus a very convincing description of what sex among angels is like-- insofar as a human being can experience it!

And it was the first reference I ever encountered, to 'post-awakening practice.'

My understanding is that - at least depending on the student - the first koan given is Mu.
I've heard of people spending ten years on it until they pop. Then practice can really start.
Rinzai is big on post enlightenment training, using the Koan system to deepen the student's understanding of "This". The expectation in the Rinzai tradition is that you get enlightened. I've heard that in the old days, after a monk got it, the other monks would hoist him up on their shoulders and dance around the monastery.

If you guys want to read a lovely commentary on koan practice, you might want to check this out:

Eloquent Silence: Nyogen Senzaki's Gateless Gate and Other Previously Unpublished Teachings and Letters

He was one of the first Zen monks to come over to the United States. He was caught up in the internment camps during WWII and established a zendo in one of them.

Gain and loss. Praise and blame. Fame and disrepute. Pleasure and pain.

I write these words often. The first noble truth is about acknowledging these tides of experience. It's incredibly difficult not to take sides.

"Only pleasure! Only gain! Only fame and only praise!"

That will never be, no matter how realized you are.

But that doesn't mean there isn't hope. There is always hope.

There is always practice.

By the way...

Is it just me, or does it seem like a lot of meditation instructors (if not most) are teaching post-realization practices to pre-realized folks?

Yes!! I've observed the same over the last couple years. It's a widespread problem. I imagine it's a major contributor to lack of progress for many meditators.

3_Trainings, that's what I suspect as well. Thanks for chiming in.

"3_Trainings, that's what I suspect as well. Thanks for chiming in."

what are "post realization practices" and who is teaching them?

"what are "post realization practices" and who is teaching them?" -Tele

That's a good question. There are a lot of them. A common one is Adyashanti's "Allow everything to be as it is," teaching. For a beginner, this usually doesn't work out too well. But for someone who has been practicing a while, and has already awakened to some degree, this teaching/practice can be very useful.

Another example is the way that meditation teachers talk about tending to our personal psychology, and morality, and giving back, and yadda yadda. They emphasize this stuff because it's the cutting edge of "their" practice. It shouldn't necessarily be the cutting edge of their students' respective practices.

Make sense? I could just be blowing smoke. I guess people tend to teach what they're excited about, and what's relevant for them at their particular junction on the path. That isn't always what students need to hear.

Jackson, you must have been reading Alan Chapman's web site

Of course, I think you're right and the neo-Advaita crowd is especially bad about this.

I've been staying out of the loop in regards to the "direct path" or "PCE" style of practice, or mode of perception, or whatever.

I have no doubt that stabilizing this mode of perception is beneficial for some. Otherwise, it wouldn't be so widely discussed both here and at the DhO. I'm just not interested in it. It's not what I'm after.

And that's an important point to make, actually. Just because I'm not interested in something, it doesn't mean this thing is bad or wrong, or even necessarily harmful or misleading. I don't know if it is or not. But I know I'm not interested in it. I know that, as for now, my practice isn't going in that direction.

I've noticed that teachers tend to get excited about the cutting edge of their practice, and then place a great deal of emphasis on whatever that is. This has it's pros and cons. One pro is that the teaching is often more alive, and juicy, and exciting when the teacher is really into it. One con is that it may cause other practices to get pushed down in importance, and those practices could be useful to some folks who aren't ready to benefit from the latest emphasized practice. In reading this very thread, I can see where I have emphasized all kinds of practices at different times, and downplayed the importance of others, only to change my mind just days or weeks later. It happens. We're human.

So, I'm keeping an open mind about this stuff in a way. And at the same time, deciding to keep my distance a bit. I don't want to get into very many conversations about something I'm not interested in, nor understand very well. It all has so much to do with what each of us is after. That's what we'll be shooting for in the end.

Lately I've been sitting down to practice and attempting to notice the subtle intention and cravings for a certain type of experience. This almost always happens as soon as I sit. But thing always go better when I just sit down, acknowledge what's happening in the moment, and allow any desires, cravings, or intentions to manipulate dissolve before they cause any mischief.

At home, I've been practicing while lounging on my couch. It's a lazy posture, no doubt, but it works for me. I am able to relax into rigpa, and to enjoy being awake for as long as it lasts. Relax and remember. That's really all there is to it.

Other times that isn't what happens at all. Today, I sat and noticed how contracted I was. My body was tight and warm in some areas, and there was a general lack of expansiveness or spaciousness. I immediately wanted to get to that place, but noticed the wanting and let it go. Instead of relaxing into rigpa, the progress of insight cycles kicked in and I travelled through the ñanas, through to cessation and back again, until it was time to head back to work. Whatever happens is OK. It's even OK if nothing happens at all.

I'm pretty sure that's what the Zen guys mean when they talk about there being no right or wrong, no good or bad. It has to do with your experience, not some philosophical position. It's about not grasping or resisting what's happening right now. Labeling something as good or bad, right or wrong, is just one way that we either grasp or resist experience.

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