awouldbehipster's practice notes (part 3)

It's quite silly to try and manipulate your way to being awake. Yes, you should use effort. But there's a difference between "wise" and "unwise" effort (we could just as easily say "pragmatic effort" and "unpragmatic effort.") Wise effort is the effort of letting go and letting be, of actively acknowledging, of wakefulness, and of taking the one seat. Unwise effort is anything that makes you grasp, resist, or ignore. Realization is multifaceted. Realization is vast. Don't limit yourself to preconceived notions of what it means to be awake. Allow the facets of awakening to reveal themselves through good practice. It's really the only way it'll happen, anyway.

Practice well, everybody!

~Jackson

"When you plant seeds in the garden, you don't dig them up every day to see if they have sprouted yet. You simply water them and clear away the weeds; you know that the seeds will grow in time. Similarly, just do your daily practice and cultivate a kind heart. Abandon impatience and instead be content creating the causes for goodness; the results will come when they're ready.'
'”Thubten Chodron

A reminder that practice results are organic, not mechanical.

Thanks. That's just what I needed to hear today.

Yeah, me too. Thanks Jackson.

It's not that contraction is bad and expansion is good. Any value judgments we place on different kinds of experience are, for the most part, based on preference. For me, and I think for many people who engage in Buddhist practice, the preference is based on suffering and its alleviation. What is going to bring me out of suffering right now? What will allow me to bring less suffering to myself and to others? Again, I don't think this is some Absolute, Universal value system. It's a choice. It's always a choice. And whether or not choice is illusory, it's still a function of human experience.

So, this morning I sat down and noticed that contraction was causing me to suffer. I chose to practice in a way that I knew could release the tension and expand my experience in a way that allows me to suffer less. It worked. Just another example of how useful it is to have many tools for practice.

I felt really contracted and stressed out this morning. I chose to focus on 1st gear/vipassana as a way to break up the tensions and release some of the physical and emotional clenching that's been going on. (Life continues to throw curveballs at me. It's been a challenging year.)

Vipassana works to alleviate stress, and to open back up when feeling closed off. At least it does for me. What's interesting to me about the stages/ñanas that arise during vipassana is that they are not the point. I don't even think fruition/cessation is necessarily the point. Sure, it is at first. But after a while, the ñanas, cycles, fruitions/cessations, or whatever else are just symptoms of properly conducted practice. They arise when one is doing the technique properly. I'm more interested, lately, in results that have less to do with symptoms of a properly applied technique, and more to do with my experience as a human being. Does practicing meditation improve my life in some way? Does it alleviate suffering, or bring more of it? Does it facilitate and openness to experience, or a sort of shutting done or closing off? Can it be applied off-the-cushion? Etc.

(continued below)

"But after a while, the ñanas, cycles, fruitions/cessations, or whatever else are just symptoms of properly conducted practice. They arise when one is doing the technique properly. -Jackson"

Your words resonate with me strongly here, Jackson.
I am also feeling in my practice recently that nyanas progressing are simply the result of a properly conducted practice. And obviously sometimes it is good to check if it is going well, but they are not the point.

Thanks, yadidb.

I remember a time when I would enjoy the process of cycling through the ñanas for its own sake. There's something wonderful about seeing the effects of practice in real-time, and there is definitely a sense of awe due to the novelty of it all.

But the novelty fades. The stages become just another set of experiences that occur when certain techniques are employed. And this is where the spirit of Pragmatic Dharma kicks in. Rather than dismiss the ñanas as unimportant or dismissible (as I've seen happen for some folks), Pragmatic Dharma (in my opinion) inspires us to use these stages to our advantage. One way to do that is to use them as evidence that our practice is being done in the most effective way. If we're moving through the stages, and we're not getting stuck, that's a good thing. If we get stuck, we can adjust. When it works, another sign appears.

What are the desired effects, if not the symptoms themselves?

"Freedom in heaven, freedom in hell."

Spontaneous moments of empty-wakefulness have been creeping up on me lately. It happens unexpectedly, out of the blue. Sometimes it is triggered by a compassionate response to something I read or hear about, usually with regard to pain, suffering, or general hardship. Things just fling wide open. Labels drop. Pre-conceived judgments are forgotten. Just writing about it, right this second, has induced it.

The first time I posted a comment at the old Dharma Overground, it was in response to a post asking the forum members to give one word to describe their practice. The word I chose, from the very beginning, was "worthwhile."

My opinion hasn't changed. Practice is worthwhile.

I just wanted to take a moment to say that I'm inspired by the sincere dedication of so many people who participate at this forum. People are really practicing. People are engaging in practice deeply, and with integrity. It's refreshing to find a place where people aren't just talking about dharma. We live it out, here. Amazing.

Keep up the good work, everyone.

Choosing to do noting practice really worked out for me today. I wonder what will happen in practice tomorrow.

EDIT: Hokai Sobol just posted the following quote on Facebook...

"...One must accept the whole situation as it is, both the light and the dark, the good and the bad. One must open to life, communicate with it - you are not trying to defend the light against the dark." ~ Trungpa Rinpoche

*Exhales deeply*

Things have a way of working out given time, Jackson.

Haven't felt like posting here in a while, but a friend pointed me in the direction of something that I think is extremely relevant in what's going on here:

Basic negativity is very revealing, sharp and accurate. If we leave it as basic negativity rather than overlaying it with conceptualizations, then we see the nature of its intelligence. Negativity breeds a great deal of energy, which clearly seen becomes intelligence. When we leave the energies as they are with their natural qualities, they are living rather than conceptualized. They strengthen our everyday lives.

- An excerpt from the chapter "Working with Negativity" in the book "The Myth Of Freedom" by Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche.

(found on Pema Chodrin's facebook page: on.fb.me/bEbvt3 )

Why is it that so many people in dharma forums (including myself) think they have to be the experts all the time?

The question to answer ratio is alarmingly weighted toward the latter. Maybe it's just the phase of life that I'm in, but I'm tired of having answers.

I think I'll stick to questions for a while. Perhaps indefinitely. At this point, I see very little value in perceiving myself as an expert.

"Maybe it's just the phase of life that I'm in, but I'm tired of having answers. I think I'll stick to questions for a while."-awouldbehipster

I hear you, Jackson. The only time I make progress is when I admit I don't know.