Antero's pactise journal 2

I really like the sound of this, Antero. Based on your written reports and our weekly discussions, I think this could be 2nd Path. Thanks for being an inspiration to all of us.

Kenneth

Thank you Kenneth!

I owe all my possible attainments to you and this incredible sangha. It is highly motivating and to read the practise reports of all the gifted yogis on this site.

Antero.

The change I have noticed in me during the past four days is not huge at all. I think I may have experienced a glimpse of the real thing and for the first time I get what this process is all about. It feels as though I have climbed over a hill and an exciting new landscape has been revealed to me. This makes me more motivated that ever to finish this thing once and for all.

For the past two months I have been doing noting all the time, even in dreams. Suddenly noting feels crude and totally unnecessary. The mind is more transparent and I am noticing more and more subtle layers of aversion and greed. I see myself from the outside like I was watching a movie and curiously observing how the protagonist manages certain situations and at times I am amused by his stupidity and ignorance.

At work the mind seems sharper and more focused than ever. It solves difficult problems systematically, efficiently and without tiring. This is a great help since I have been recently going through a very demanding phase at work.

I notice many situations which would have irritated me before. To be more accurate, I see the irritation arise (out of habit), it is recognized for what it is and it dissipates before I know it.

Even though I can now jump to any jhana (between one and eight) in any order at the speed of a thought, I feel that jhanas are rather boring. I don't know if this makes me a freak, but I am finding the dukkha nanas much more interesting as I seem to be able to explore them one by one.

Very interesting report, Antero. It's great to have such a clear chronicle of progress as it unfolds. Keep us posted!

Awesome posts, Antero. Really great stuff. Very inspirational.

Thank you bauseer for your kind words! It makes me happy to hear that my posts are of use to you.

Antero.

Yesterday I tried if I can still access the Witness and took the no-dog for a walk. It was before the Stream Entry when I practised the Witness last time and I was a bit unsure if I could do it on the fly. Despite my doubts, I felt the perspective slowly change as I walked home.

45 min sit
The jhanic arc has slowed down a bit from the high speed mode few days ago. After one round as I rose again to the 6th jhana, I paid attention to the feeling of the observer and the Witness really kicked in. As I continued to ride the arc as the Witness, my experience was coloured by brightness, complacency and warmness at the spine.

After getting to the 8th jhana again and then weightlessly floating down to the 1st jhana as the light of the fruition merged into the brightness, I let go of the Witness. Then for a moment there was only light and being. How wonderful and simple!

"I was very deep in absorption and probably almost asleep..."

Hi Antero, sometimes when I am in equanimity and think that I am getting deeper it also gradually feels like I am half-asleep. How do you know if you really "in absorption" and practicing effectively, and not just zoning out being really half asleep?

Chuanose,

I think that is a valid question, but I don't know the answer for that one. I was concerned myself about the lack of clarity and awareness during these deep absorptions but Kenneth have reassured me many times that at the equanimity stage it is normal and even helpful to go deep to the point of being asleep. My working assumption is that in those states 'I' am less getting in the way of the natural growth and progress. This process I have recently started to trust more and more.

Antero.

40 min sit

I wonder if dwelling as the Witness can speed up the jhanic arc? As I started the sit, the arc moved at a leisure pace and it took some 10 minutes to get to the 8th jhana. After a couple of rounds the fruition started to happen already at the 4th jhana. Then the cycles were gradually speeding up to the point that the fruition happened every 30 to 40 seconds.

Thanks Antero, that helps give me confidence. Kenneth assured me of that too, but I was a little concerned of my own reporting, whether it was really absorption in equanimity or just plain asleep!

During my recent sits I have been getting more and more this feeling that my hands are off the steering wheel and I am watching with interest where the autopilot is taking me. I am hoping that I can sustain this attitude even when things no longer go smoothly.

Good helpful attitude. Let it flow!

Also in my experience dwelling in the Witness to ride the jhanic arc coupled with noting during the rough periods, is a most effective and fast way to 3rd path.

A little bit of kasina before you ride the arc can be pretty intense.

Just did it, very cool experience!

Thanks guys!

Perhaps I could try a little bit of Kasina. I have never done it.

Antero.

40 min sit after asana practise

The sit was similar to Review B phase as I rose to the 8th jhana and came back the same way without experiencing fruitions. Although the sit started from A/P, there was no strobing and pulsing. In the end of the sit the flickering and the vibration started at the third eye and I experienced a fruition at the 4th jhana.

Last night I couldn't sleep. I just didn't feel tired and after one hour of trying I went to sit. Surges of energy rose from the root chakra as I sat. These were felt as shuddering, twitching and trembling and were mostly pleasant.

The Witness

Some observations after two weeks of practise:

a.
Concentration on the centre of the head comes quite naturally during the Witness. It is easy to hold the object too tightly which results in heaviness and throbbing, even headache during the day. Relaxing the attention brings spaciousness and brightness and deeper absorption.

b.
Doing the Witness on the cushion strengthens the introverted side of me during the day. I have to be careful with that since 'just minding my own business' is already one of my notable traits.

c.
The Witness seems to accelerate the progression through the nanas on and off the cushion

d.
I am experiencing the nanas differently now either because of the Witness or because of the stage in my development. Or it could be both. Now I always feel the nanas 3-4 and 6-10 (and sometimes 11) as changing patterns of vibrations. Recently I have almost never had any unpleasant physical sensations during The Three Characteristics and the Dukkha nanas. Except for itching sensation in my nose a couple of times, which I have never had before.

e.
I have started to see the connection between the Bystander and the Witness. The Bystander (see how it writes'¦) is seen from the point of view of the Witness. Only some absorption is needed and the Bystander changes to the Witness. Recently the Bystander has become an effective pointer to the Witness state.

Yesterday I went to an osteopath to get some relief to my persistent cramps in the lower back and the right hip. I expected get some physical manipulation, but instead the guy just rested his hands on various places on my body.

It was interesting to observe what happened next. My mind calmed down very fast and I noticed that I had already risen to the 5th nana. There was very much energy activity on the left side of my lower back and I felt release of tension and some twitching. Soon I lost the consciousness of the body as the jhanic arc rose fast all the way up to the 8th jhana. Then a fruition happened and the same cycle repeated.

After the treatment I talked with the osteopath and he said that he first observed the rhythm of the body and memorized it. Then he compared it to the rhythm of different body parts and helped them to get to the same rhythm. He said that his job was just to let the body heal itself as it knows what is best for it.

It was an interesting experience. Some of the cramps were gone immediately after the treatment and some have disappeared today.

Wow. Thats quite interesting Antero.
Thanks for sharing.

A couple of fruitions happened during my sit today. My guess is that I have just completed my first insight cycle after the path moment. Not that it matters much.

I must have crossed the A/P a week and a half ago (post #66). Last week I noticed some clear dark night symptoms and the last couple of days I have been at the equanimity. The dark night was much more pronounced than after first path, but still very manageable with the help of the Witness.

Rediscovering my nose

This morning I did my usual Ashtanga yoga series before meditation. At the end of the series I learned something new about the dristhis. Although I have been doing the Ashtanga for ten years, I think today I may have done the eye focus or dristhi properly for the first time.

There are certain points of focus for the gaze called dristhis in all Ashtanga yoga asanas. These vary from asana to asana, but the most common focus is the tip of the nose or nasagrai. More information about the dristhis can be found for example here:

www.ashtanga-vinyasa-yoga.co.uk/Drishti.html

As I focused my gaze softly on the tip of my nose, the nose became a huge floating mountain in front of my face. I became very absorbed in it and it felt like it was sucking in my gaze. There was a very clear connection between the nose and my eyes and I almost felt like becoming the object of my focus. It felt similar to being absorbed in the Witness and I didn't want to break the absorption.

When I started to sit after the asana practise, I found myself immediately in the 11th nana.

Last night I had a dream where I got fully enlightened. It happened twenty meters off the ground and the light show was immense with surges of bliss and happiness. I also enjoyed having powers similar to Superman.

Something to look forward to

Today I talked to Kenneth and he taught me to be aware of the possibility of the next jhana after the eighth. I got the impression that it is possible to slowly cover new territory until the 9th jhana will some day appear.

After our session I rode the arc as the Witness with my eyes open lying on the bed and staring at the wall. I was getting some visual distortions at the 7th and 8th jhana. I kind of expected to slide down after the eight, but instead felt a pull upward. The attention shifted a little bit from the eight jhana, but was still pointing up. The distortions got weird, so I closed my eyes to get a closer look. I was aware of my body and immediately thought that I had had a fruition and was transformed back to the first jhana, but the attention was not pointing forward. I experienced warm coloured light, perhaps deep yellow or orange and a sense of wellbeing. After a little while I dropped back to the eight jhana and made a note that the attention shifter only a little to the third eye.

I am aware that it is possible to compound new jhanas with sufficient concentration, so I am not putting much importance on this. Just reporting what happened.